Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Furiarse Reflexes...



First off, I'd just like to apologise for the lack of posting... Have picked up a few magazine jobs (as well as other jobs!) so although I'm getting gradually closer to my beautiful motorbike, time has been scarce. But hey, just settling down with a hot water bottle,cup of creamy coffee and cosy duvet; ready to bore you to death with a ramble. So sit back and indulge in my mundane moaning...




So, it's been snowing in London.
 Exciting? Thick? Sledding? I hear you chirp; Not quite.
 More like one evening of the pretty pitter patter and now just the icy, sludgy consequences to trudge in.
No time off work, just extra effort getting to work. Wonderful. 


However, while pegging it to through icy streets to work (brilliant fun that; run as fast as possible for minimal foot-to-ground contact and intensified thrill with more probable danger of falling. Hell yeah-keep your sky diving- I already live life on the edge)  I was met with an puzzling discovery. It was a rather painful one too.

So there I was; headphones in pumping the 'feel good' through my system, skating across the ice in heeled boots. I felt like a superhero
Distracted by my (evident) awesomeness, suddenly my footing wavered. My insides gasped, feet lost confidence and I felt that sudden gush of butterflies flutter through my tummy. Down, down down I tumbled. Oh, and this was no admirably smooth superhero fall.

THWUMP, went the uncomfortable acquaintance between my arse and concrete pavement. Now, here's my query:
Why is it that here, bum bashed and grounded,  that I felt such bitter,unfocused rage? Within seconds, my eyebrows furrowed dramatically and I was engulfed with a curious anguish, with of course no one to actually focus it at. Where does this reflex fury come from?! Is this just me?! Am I the only one who feels this sharp pinch of anger when I fall on my bum?!  And do you know what? I genuinely feel pissed off with the pavement, so I sit there scowling at it.


Soon of course, the embarrassment floods in.
 I'm on my bum,slithering about, looking aggressively at the floor.
Of course people are giggling. Red-faced and filled with displaced emotions, I begin my numerous stumbling attempts to regain balance and swap back from bum-to-feet contact. On achieving this, I am filled with relief and thus I make a vow: 
 'never,NEVER,shall I fall down again.never shall I hit that rock concrete bottom again, never shall I put myself through the trauma. Walking will be carried out with the utmost caution from now on, for as long as I shall live'

70m later...


"ARGHHH , BLIMMING PAVEMENT! "